Last night, I attended a language exchange event at a trendy cafe in Songjjang Nanjing. To claim that I wasn't exceedingly nervous beforehand would be far from the truth. While I don't consider myself a shy person, there are certain situations that make me anxious. Meeting a group of 15 strangers, all of whom were Taiwanese and mostly had limited English proficiency, could be pretty intimidating, even for someone rather outgoing like myself.
Since my arrival in Taipei, I've noticed the challenges of making friends here. While not everyone falls into this category, many Taiwanese people tend to be reserved and shy. Consequently, as a foreigner, forming connections can be quite challenging. Many individuals are hesitant to initiate conversations with me due to concerns about their English speaking abilities, despite many being perfectly able to hold a simple conversation. This was a point raised during a discussion last night, although it's possible they were trying to offer reassurance about my current lack of friends. At the event, however, I noticed that many people were keen to engage in conversations with me and learn about my experiences as a Londoner. They were curious about the differences between life in London and Taipei. It's understandable since many of them had never been to England and had only formed their impressions of life there from media such as TV and films—similar to how I had perceived life in Taiwan before coming here. This was also due to the fact that I was the only non-Taiwanese person in attendance. The topic of discussion for the evening was "What do you do on a Typhoon day off?" While I haven't had many opportunities to experience extreme weather changes, I shared my story about my first day in Taiwan when a minor typhoon occurred. The format was to share your story in both Chinese and English. However, due to my extremely limited Chinese language skills, I spoke only in English. Then, after I was done telling my story some of the other attendees at the event then assisted me in translating it into Chinese, providing me with the chance to learn new words and phrases which I found insightful and enjoyable.
Returning to my point about my difficulty in making immediate friendships, I had a conversation with two Taiwanese natives yesterday about this, asking them why they think it could be difficult for a foreigner to make friends in Taiwan and I found their opinions very interesting. They went on to say that they believe it is down to a lack of confidence from them but also a feeling of embarrassment when it comes to speaking in English. Many Taiwanese people want to learn and practice their English speaking skills but they are afraid of making conversation. I have found this to be true also in my experience so far, for example on the MRT nobody is talking, and this holds true for most public places. So when I approach someone and attempt to engage in conversation with them I can see a sense of panic in their eyes, it's almost as if they are afraid of me. Now I’m not sure that is actually the case, it could be in certain scenarios perhaps, I am fairly tall at 6’1 but I don't consider myself an imposing figure. However, I have found that when I can speak to someone for a longer amount of time they become much more comfortable and seem to enjoy the challenge that comes with speaking in English.
On my walk home that evening I took the opportunity to take in some of the city lights at night and it was a delight, I talked before about how alive the city feels at night and I definitely stand by that, so much is happening and going on in all directions it's really quite wonderful. I even saw a man preparing a pig carcass in his van on the side of the road making sure he was ready for the flood of potential customers about to enter the night market. Although I was too early to try the food I will make sure I get the chance next time!
Unfortunately, I am going to finish this article off with what was my first slightly uncomfortable situation here in Taipei. I was sitting outside in a relaxing, plant-covered coffee shop with a couple of friends I had met through the language exchange when a man who was passing down the street beside me shouted something in what seemed like my direction, though I couldn’t understand what it was he was saying so I just sort of waved at him as if to say hello back. But he persisted with another shout and at this point, I was pretty confused so I asked my friends what it was he was saying and they told me that he was shouting ‘foreigner’. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not usually the kind of person to be too easily offended or upset by things these days but I did genuinely feel taken aback by the situation, for me that was the first time in my life I’d been a victim of that type of situation and I must say it felt pretty grim. So after that had all gone down it made me think more about how so many other people must feel each day where they are treated the same and worse.
It certainly has not tarnished my opinion of Taiwan, however, it has made me wonder now when so many people look at me on the MRT or down the street whether they are happy for me to be here or if will I always be seen as a ‘tourist’ and ‘foreigner’.
Author
Ethan Turner